


Silver Linings

by Andromakhe



Series: Fated Attraction [1]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-24
Updated: 2013-07-26
Packaged: 2018-05-02 20:12:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5261915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andromakhe/pseuds/Andromakhe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Introspective vignettes. Asajj thinks about Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan thinks about his failed mission. Both find solace in their encounter. Set just after "Revenge." Inspired by Bonnie Tyler's "Holding Out For A Hero."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. To Be Loved

Asajj:

I looked over at Kenobi, beside me in the cockpit we just escaped in. I registered his statement about those Zabrak being after us both, but that was oddly not what I was thinking about at the moment. No. I was thinking about the Knight beside me, and how my life was turning out much differently than I'd expected since my sisters were murdered. And I was thinking how it was largely said Knight's fault.

The cockpit hovered near my transport. I snorted inwardly. Of course. Kenobi would be a gentleman and drop the woman off first, even if he'd be in more danger alone if they caught him. I blinked.

Obi-Wan actually quirked a wry smile and looked at me intently. "Asajj, thank you...for saving my life. And for the loan of a lightsaber. I...suppose you must be terribly disappointed in me. It's all right. I can't blame you. I guess this is goodbye."

"Well, you saved our lives when you got us out of there, so consider the debts paid. Both of them. And come now, my dear. With us, it's never goodbye. More like, 'Till we meet again.'" I leapt out and boarded my own ship, looking back as he began pulling away.

I saw Obi-Wan smile fully and lift a hand in a salute as he called, "Until next time, darling."

I flanked the cockpit until I saw the Jedi take off in his ship. I turned away and felt for his presence in the Force. I felt him near me until I entered hyperspace. I smiled, and then froze. Kenobi had made me smile.

Setting my course for Tatooine, I exited my cockpit and sat on the floor in a meditative pose and continued thinking of that blasted Knight. What was it about him that was so...so...compelling? He's everything I usually don't like in a man. Too kind-hearted, too soft, too civilized. Another voice in my head whispered, _And Dooku was so much better._ Great. My own thoughts were betraying me.

Pursing my lips, I thought back to how I found him. I was not expecting to find him with Savage, but on top of that, he was out cold. I've never seen him like that. I could have killed him right then. But to be honest, my first thought was not to kill him. Maybe it was because it didn't seem fair to do so when he was unarmed and defenseless. Perhaps it was because there'd be no satisfaction in killing him without a fight. But my first thought was that he was no longer my enemy because I was no longer Dooku's assassin, and therefore, I could help him.

I lent him one of my lightsabers without hesitation, though I did realize that fighting with only one saber was not something I was used to and could put me in jeopardy. Still, he was now an ally and my aim was to work cooperatively with him. I briefly considered that we stood together, not facing each other across blades. I toyed with the idea of sparring with him one day. He reached out to me in the Force and prompted for my focus. And even though we failed the battle, all I really remember is that the two of us fighting as a team made me the happiest I'd been in a long time. Happiness even greater than that of bloodshed and vengeance. Or should I say, more pure? It was like...like how I felt with Ky, but different because Obi-Wan is different.

When I saw those two animals were going to torture and butcher my Knight, I felt something I almost forgot about. I felt sympathy. I reasoned that since Kenobi was not an enemy, I could feel it freely. Those beasts were not going to have the satisfaction of killing Kenobi if I could help it. No, Kenobi deserved an honorable warrior's death. To fall in combat.

I suddenly wondered how Kenobi was holding up just now. He really didn't look so great when I found him. I remember when Dooku betrayed me and I attacked him and his sorry excuse for a Padawan. That's one thing Dooku and I agree on. Skywalker's not worthy to be called a Knight. When Obi-Wan saw me, he said I didn't look well. I hope the next time I see him, he will be looking better.

Obi-Wan...He's unlike anyone I've encountered before. Only Ky could match his compassion, but even Ky was my Master. I am desperately trying not to hope. After all, Kenobi is a Knight in the truest sense of the word. He has responsibilities in this war and in any case, I would not be welcome in his circles. I probably would hate his circles, come to think of it. But if both of us were to survive this war...

I bit my lip and shook my head. _No. Don't be a fool, Ventress. It's not like that. And even if it were, it'd never work._ But already I knew it was too late. I hope. I hope for security, for respect, for loyalty and reciprocity. If Kenobi lives, there is hope.


	2. To Be Needed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to add Obi-Wan’s POV of the "Revenge" episode along with Asajj’s thoughts on Obi-Wan. I think it expands the ideas I have on why Kentress is my OTP and juxtaposing them like this provides an easier way to compare them. For those who already read Asajj’s chapter, I haven’t really changed it, so no real need to revisit it. Hope you enjoy my take on Obi-Wan. It’s been a while since I watched the episode, so I’m going by memory. Any errors are mine. As you read, keep in mind that Asajj claims Savage’s bounty, and thus Savage, as her target, and think how she may want vengeance on him.

Obi-Wan:

This mission was a disaster. There’s really no other way to put it. Everything that could go wrong did, and perhaps worst of all, Asajj Ventress was witness to my humiliation. Yes, this thought is more embarrassing than it should be. I’d probably never hear the end of it from Anakin if this had happened with him, judging by the previous incidents in which he had to rescue me. But no, if Anakin had been with me, it wouldn’t have happened at all. Padawans rescuing Masters is part of what bonds us, though, so if I have to take some good-natured teasing, so be it. Ventress is another matter. 

It all started with the fateful hologram. I was saddened and disgusted by the massacre of innocent beings just because Maul had a vendetta against me, which of course meant they died because of me. I wanted to avenge their deaths - kill Maul properly this time. I’d fought him alone before and I was just a Padawan then. From Master’s point of view, given that he said I was ready for the Trials, I was unofficially Knight material at that time. As a Master now, surely I had even more skill. Seeing Maul again sharpened the pain of losing Qui-Gon, but thinking about that wouldn’t help me at all, so I buried it as best I could. Bringing others with me seemed unthinkable. I didn’t want to deal with more people dying because they came with me. I did not acknowledge the whispered thought that Maul was my enemy, my quarry, mine to kill.

The journey to Raydonia saw me thinking of Master, remembering him in my arms, his whispered words about Anakin bringing balance to the Force, and most cherished of all, his fingers stroking my cheek as I tried so hard not to cry and make his last moments more painful. Yes, I know it didn’t fool Master, and that’s why I loved him. I think he was trying to comfort me, and ironically, it made my job to be a strong Jedi harder. Over the years, I’ve longed for his steady, calming presence; his wise advice; his ability to understand my emotions and help me work through them without condemnation. Perhaps this is why the rest of the mission went so badly. It was doomed from the start with me in no condition to focus.

Exchanging pleasantries with Maul was business as usual. I had to do something to keep my grief and anger at bay. But the ambush caught me off guard, and that’s when I had the first inkling that I was in a galaxy of trouble. Still, I was moving, so all hope wasn’t lost yet, so I carried on with the banter.

The next thing I remember was Ventress saying she was my ally. What? Had I heard right? Maybe I was dreaming. No. The pain was very real. What surprised me the most was that the idea of Ventress on my side wasn’t at all repugnant. Somewhat awkward, perhaps, but not unpleasant. So I tried to tease her by calling her "good," but she made it quite clear I was to have no delusions of her kindness. Seeing I’d overstepped an invisible boundary, I went back to the usual sincerity veiled in mockery and said she was a lovely sight to wake up to. Granted, she’s not really what I’d call beautiful, but she’s amazing to watch in combat, even against me, and I meant it more in the sense that I was happy to find a friend at that moment. I must admit that her retort hurt. It’s not that I’m all that vain, but she misinterpreted. Still, I probably did look terrible. Was she perhaps hiding concern under that scorn?

After picking myself up, Ventress lent me a lightsaber. I knew she was taking a risk in doing so, since I’d never seen her fight with one saber. I was sure she could, but it’d be like me fighting with two sabers. I can, but it’s not the method I’m most comfortable with. I resolved to retrieve my own lightsaber as soon as possible.

When Maul and his ally appeared, I realized they’d been gone. I wondered how Ventress had managed it, but the fight was on, and there was no more time to ponder. Being used to working in tandem with other people, I didn’t find it too difficult to keep track of Ventress from time to time. I think what surprised me was how well she worked with me. Somehow, I thought she’d insist on leadership or we’d bicker about how to get things done. As it was, it appeared she knew how to be a team player, and this was gratifying and satisfying. There was little time to savor that realization, though, since if I didn’t save her now, she’d be dead. Fortunately, I threw her lightsaber just in time.

As my own fight intensified, I found myself separated from Ventress, and that’s when my tenuous emotional stability was shattered. It wasn’t the separation itself, but Maul’s well-placed verbal jab, which slashed open a wound that was already tender and exposed due to his very existence. I don’t remember much between losing control and telling Ventress we had to run. I just knew that if we didn’t escape, it would be the end of me, and I couldn’t leave her alone with them. Fear and anger had rendered me rather incapable of thought, so I was glad when she suggested the cockpit. In hindsight, I’m surprised she didn’t insist on piloting it. Instead, she had the riskier proposition of guarding me against both Zabrak and trying to make it inside. Trying to hasten things along, I used the Force to help Ventress to jump, and wondered what it would feel like to catch her. Seeing that she was all right, I set to work figuring out how to detach the escape pod. I heard the lightsabers trying to cut through the doors and maybe my mounting panic interfered with fine motor coordination. But at last, I managed it, and not a moment too soon. I realized Ventress had been just as frightened as I was as we both tried to calm our racing hearts. 

I knew that without Asajj’s help, I would be dead now. I was the one who needed her; not the other way around. Maybe I ran the risk of being too friendly again, but I had to at least tell her that I understood what she’d done for me, what she’d risked for me. Even if it wasn’t for me and she merely enlisted me because she couldn’t handle both Zabrak by herself, the fact still remained that she’d done me a favor. I would acknowledge this and I’m sure I’ll never forget our alliance. Indeed, I want to do it again one day. 

Yes, the mission had been a disaster. But because of it, I learned that Qui-Gon’s death still hurts me, that I need to be mindful of my own Dark tendencies, and that someone I once considered an adversary has Light in her. I believe in her, even if no one else does, and I hope to see her again.


End file.
